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Frequently Asked Questions

Many people are new to therapy and simply don't know what to expect. That's normal! Here are some answers to questions that I've been asked many times before. However, if you still have questions after reading these, don't be shy - just click above and ask me what you need to know. I'll get back to you asap!

What can I expect from therapy?

In therapy, you can expect a safe and confidential space to explore your feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. Initially, we will discuss your concerns, and identify your therapeutic goals. Together we will work out what you need to know and do so you get to achieve them!

How long will I need to be in therapy?

The duration of therapy varies for each individual or couple. It depends on your specific situation, approach to therapy & your goals. Some people get what they need & make important changes in a just  few sessions; others benefit from longer-term therapy. It's useful to view therapy as a collaborative process where we keep your progress under review & together make sure you're on track towards your goals. 

What if I don’t feel comfortable sharing everything?

It’s completely normal to feel hesitant about sharing certain thoughts or feelings. Therapy is a process, and you can share at your own pace. Our aim is to work together to build trust and create a comfortable environment for you. And, in my experience, we often don't need to get into the detail of things that have happened to find a way to make sense of it and find resolution.

How do I know if therapy is working?

You will likely notice changes in your thoughts, feelings, and behaviours over time and I'll be alongside to remind you of what you're already achieving. Other people may even start to notice too. We will regularly check in on your progress and adjust our approach as needed to ensure you’re moving towards your goals.

Can therapy help with communication issues in my relationship?

Yes! Therapy can be very effective in improving communication - not only in your most important relationships, but with friends, colleagues and beyond. We will uncover your underlying issues, explore the mechanics of good & bad communication styles and learn how to effectively apply some tools & techniques that will help you to communicate more effectively, by better understanding yourself & others. This is often where couples therapy starts - once you can communicate effectively, anything is possible!

What if my partner isn’t interested in therapy?

It’s common for one partner to be more willing or ready to engage with therapy than the other. You can still benefit from individual therapy though, to gain insights, develop communication skills, and explore your feelings about the relationship. In my humble opinion, change can start with one ... However, sometimes the most reluctant of partners, once in the room, will open up in ways that you didn't imagine possible. So if this is a relationship issue you want to deal with, do try to encourage them to join you.

What therapy model do you use?

As a relationship specialist, with training in psychology, psychotherapy & transformational coaching, I have a wealth of knowledge & experience that allows me to blend a wide array of therapeutic styles, theories, techniques & tools to tailor my approach to what works best for each client. While this integrative approach is less easy to define or provide a road map of than say, those couples therapists who offer 'The Gottman Method' or counsellors who deliver Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, I emphasise getting to know you, introducing those elements in therapy that I consider will make a difference to your situation. This highly personalised approach is why I believe my clients typically achieve their therapeutic goals - and often exceed them. 

Is what I share in therapy confidential?

Yes, confidentiality is a fundamental aspect of therapy. What you share will always remain private, with a few exceptions related to safety or legal obligations. These are detailed in the Therapy Contract I send to you and reiterated in your first session. 

What if I feel overwhelmed by my emotions during a session?

It’s okay to feel overwhelmed; it can be a part of the healing process. We can take a pause in the conversation if it's too much and/or use grounding techniques to help you manage those emotions. Your comfort is important, and we can move at your pace.

How do I know if I need therapy?

If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or are struggling with relationships or emotions, therapy can be beneficial. It’s also helpful for personal growth or if you want to explore patterns in your life and maybe do some things differently!

Can couples therapy help with separation?

Yes. Couples often attend for therapy when considering separation & divorce. You may have heard this referred to as 'Conscious Uncoupling' - a phrase popularised by celebrities Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin. Sometimes clients have already separated and want to be sure it's the right decision for them, or they want to make peace with the ending of an important relationship to move forward into new relationships & blended family arrangements. This is different to Mediation which helps separating couples make decisions relating to financial & childcare arrangements.

What happens in a sex therapy session?

Don't worry! There is never any sexual activity in a sex therapy session. These are talking therapy sessions, that introduce you to a structured programme of exercises for you to undertake in privacy at home. There are multiple stages to the programme, which is designed around your needs, and at a pace you feel comfortable with. How you get on with these tasks is the main topic for discussion, so we will be talking a lot about sex, bodies, and related matters alongside a more prosaic conversation about your relationship.

Can I do sex therapy on my own?

Yes. You don't need to be in a relationship, or have just one partner to be in sex therapy.

Why is therapy so expensive? Why no concessions?

As a therapist, it is important to manage my well being so I work effectively with all my clients. This places a limit on the hours I can spend in client sessions - the professional standard is no more than 25 hours per week. Your fee rate therefore includes provision for my time & expertise during the hour we spend together each week, plus time for note writing, reflection & preparation for your sessions, administration, room hire, indemnity insurance, supervision, professional memberships, training & CPD, materials, technology & subscriptions and time to develop new learning resources to share with clients. ... hmmm I think that's it

Is there anyone you don't work with?

My clients are all adults aged 18+ and English is the only language I speak. Apart from that, I offer an inclusive service where everyone can expect a safe, accepting & informed experience of therapy. I have seen clients of many nationalities & diverse backgrounds in the UK and online around the world. As a GSRD (Gender, Sexual & Relationship Diversity) affirming therapist, I welcome clients who identify as LGBTQ+ and/or the kink community. If I believed I could not work with anyone because I don't have the expertise, or another professional/ organisation would be more suited to your needs, I would let you know and where possible refer onwards. 

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